The lunatic is in my head

Periodically, I use this space to pay homage to artists I believe are worthy of focused attention — artists with an extraordinary body of work and a compelling story to tell.  In this essay, I take a closer look at one of the pioneers of progressive rock who went on to become one of rock music’s most popular yet fractious bands ever:  Pink Floyd.

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June 1975.  The four members of Pink Floyd were hard at work in the Abbey Road studio putting finishing touches on the recording of “Wish You Were Here,” their eagerly awaited follow-up LP to “The Dark Side of the Moon,” which had made the band worldwide superstars.

The centerpiece of the new album was “Shine On You Crazy Diamond,” a 22-minute track broken into two 11-minute sections to open and close the album.  It was conceived as a tribute to Syd Barrett, their long-lost leader, their founder, their songwriter, their inspiration, who had fallen deep, deep into “LSD-based mental disarray” shortly after the release of the group’s 1967 debuSyd_Barrett_Abbey_Road_1975t LP, “The Piper at the Gates of Dawn,” and was dismissed from the band shortly thereafter.

As they worked that June night, Pink Floyd failed to notice when a strange-looking obese man wearing a white trenchcoat and shoes, clutching a white bag, wandered into the studio room.  His bald, eyebrow-less face looked ghostlike, and as he puttered around the band’s equipment, guitarist David Gilmour looked up and thought, “Who the hell is that, and why is he here?”

Roger Waters, the band’s new guru, saw the interloper and stopped dead in his tracks.  He turned to keyboard player Rick Wright and asked, “Do you know who that is?”   Wright looked and studied him for a moment, and then said, “Oh my God.  That’s Syd.”

It was an eerie coincidence, or creepy karma, that Barrett would suddenly appear after a seven-year absence.  He stayed less than an hour, quietly listening and observing, and Waters said later he broke down in tears at the sight of his friend, not yet 30 but looking twice that old.  When Barrett left, they never saw him again.  He lived a strictly private life and died in 2006.

pink-floyd-1973-billboard-650Pink Floyd, born from the ashes of a group called The Tea Set in 1965, has had one of the most tumultuous yet successful careers in rock history.  Their story is fraught with epic internal tension, international #1 albums, clinical madness, floating pigs, bitter rifts between founding members, huge concert tours, and worldwide sales among the highest in the business.

Not bad for a bunch of wayward art students from Cambridge.

Let’s start with a caveat:  Despite the massive sales numbers, Pink Floyd’s oeuvre is definitely not for everyone.  There are broad swaths of music lovers who regard the band with disdain, sniffing, “It’s just boring stoner music.  Give me something I can dance to, dammit!”

Indeed, even Pink Floyd was smart enough to recognize this.  In 1981, they had the brash temerity to title their compilation CD “A Collection of Great Dance Songs.”

Floyd fans never got up and danced to their music.  That was most definitely not the point.  This was music that commanded you to sit down and listen.

Their stock in trade began as experimental psychedelic rock that soon evolved into what came to be known as progressive rock, which uses rich musical teDark_Side_of_the_Moonxtures and enigmatic lyrics to challenge the limits of rock and roll.  At its best, Pink Floyd’s music was almost overwhelming in its complexity and nuance, its mesmerizing grace and sublime brilliance, its experimentalism and radical departure.

The fact that they ended up as commercially successful as they are is, in many ways, puzzling.  Let’s examine the stats:  According to Business Insider, Pink Floyd ranks ninth in all-time sales, with 75 million units sold.  The group’s signature LP, “Dark Side of the Moon,” spent an absurd 917 weeks (that’s more than 17 years!) in the US Billboard Top 200 album charts, an achievement unlikely to be surpassed (in second place is Bob Marley’s “Legends” collection, at 386).  “Dark Side” has sold 40 million copies worldwide, and still sells about 200,000 a year.  It has been estimated that one in every six households in the US has a copy of the album, and that someone, somewhere, is playing it right this minute.

Pink Floyd’s story is much like a three-act play.  Act I covers its inception to the departure of Barrett.  Act II would be the period from roughly 1968 through their heyday to the point where Waters acrimoniously splits.  Act III takes us from 1984 to present day.

Act I:

Syd Barrett Madcap Laughs 2Syd Barrett had been a childhood friend of Roger Waters when they were growing up in Cambridge, and was asked to join the group Waters had started with Nick Mason and Richard Wright, who he had met in architecture school in London.  Barrett quickly emerged as the main songwriter, singer, guitarist and front man, and nearly every song they recorded was composed by Barrett.

They were a huge success in England from the start, first in the clubs of the London Underground with their trippy performances, and then on the charts.  Two hit singles (“Arnold Layne” and “See Emily Play”) and the astonishing “Piper at the Gates of Dawn” LP were all Top Five on the charts there.  Even their prog rock peers like Jethro Tull’s Ian Anderson has said, “Pink Floyd was colorful, creative and meaningful.  Syd Barrett’s soFCngs were strange and funny, and they stretched my boundaries.  It’s as if they presented paintings as words and sounds.”

But Barrett was quickly unraveling from his unfortunate penchant for taking LSD on nearly a daily basis in the summer and fall of 1967.  It made him unproductive, disruptive and maddeningly frustrating to deal with, both on stage and in the studio. Pink_Floyd_-_all_membersWithin months, it became abundantly clear that he had gone beyond the pale, over the edge.  The rest of the group, desperate to keep their momentum, recruited Barrett’s old school chum David Gilmour, at first just to fill in Barrett’s guitar parts in concert, but ultimately, to take his place in the band’s permanent lineup.  It was a momentous change.

Waters in particular found it painful to cut Barrett loose, but he knew it was absolutely necessary.  “Pink Floyd couldn’t have happened without (Syd),” Waters said, “but on the other hand, it couldn’t have gone on with him.”

Act II:

Pink_Floyd_-_UmmagummaThe new lineup forged ahead, with Waters taking over most of the songwriting, although several tracks on the next few albums were credited to all four members.  The material they recorded on “A Saucerful of Secrets,” “Ummagumma” and “Atom Heart Mother” continued to explore new and strange sounds in the same spacey, psychedelic vein they had introduced, and the British audiences and record buyers continued to lap it up.

But all of these early records made barely a dent in the US, except among devotees listening to underground FM radio.  It wasn’t until 1971’s meddle“Meddle,” which included the hypnotic, relentless, otherworldly “One Of These Days” and the 23-minute “Echoes” that American listeners started paying closer attention.  Still, the album stalled at #70, and its followup, “Obscured By Clouds,” a soundtrack to the French film “La Vallee,” managed only #46 here.

But that all changed in March 1973 when “Dark Side of the Moon” was released. Now we were hearing heartbeats, ticking clocks, a cash register, a helicopter, maniacal laughter, mesmerizing synthesizer riffs, amazing guitar passages… and the voices.  Waters taped technicians, friends, even the studio door security guy, saying various things, scripted and unscripted, and dropped them strategically into the mix.

“There is no dark side of the moon…Matter of fact, it’s all dark…”

Most important, the music and lyrics had been carefully crafted over many months in the studio to be less eccentric and more appealing to a broader audience.  It hit a nerve among high school and college kids, who were spending untold hours in their bedrooms and dorm rooms under the headphones, spellbound by the lushly produced, technically proficient recordings.  Waters was now clearly in charge of the songwriting, and he was obsessed with the subject of madness and the things that make people insane — money, time, modern life.  Motivated partly by the sad fate of his old friend and partly by his own caustic view of societal injustices, Waters and the boys found a way, as Rolling Stone‘s Mikal Gilmore put it, “to make aPink-Floyd-David-Gilmour-Roger-Waters-Shine-On-Syd-Barrett-Abbey-Road- thoughtful and imaginative statement about grim modern realities that somehow managed to soothe you with its nightmares.”

 

It must be mentioned that each Pink Floyd album cover broke new ground in artistic audacity.  Hipgnosis, a London-based outfit, collaborated with the band to devise extraordinarily astounding images that contributed mightily to the excitement of every new Floyd release.

The band spent more than a year on the road worldwide doing sold-out shows in promotion of “Dark Side,” with increasingly arresting visuals augmenting the mind-bending music.  But as often happens to bands who achieve such widespread success, they struggled mightily about what to do next.  Waters and Gilmour were already at odds about the direction they should take, and Waters’ uncomfortable moodiness made life difficult in the creative laboratory of the recording studio.  But Gilmour had come up with a mesmerizing four-note riff that Waters thought was a perfect foundation for a long piece he wanted to write about both the loneliness and brotherhood he felt for Barrett and his dissolution.

6cc8dc4608aa7ef6595e85ea5ef3412d“Shine On You Crazy Diamond” — and the acoustic guitar-based “Wish You Were Here” — were the Barrett tributes that became the centerpieces for the “Wish You Were Here” LP, widely regarded as a thoroughly worthy follow-up to “Dark Side.”  Just as important were the tracks that decried the submission of the human race (“Welcome to the Machine”) and the way the band was now treated by the profit-motivated record label (“Have a Cigar”).  The group felt no need to sit for interviews, and in fact, they cherished their individual privacy, something most bands were happily willing to sacrifice in the name of fame.  No matter:  The album went straight to #1 in multiple countries.

As Wright put it, “I particularly like that record, the atmospherics.  I think the best material from the Floyd was when two or three of us co-wrote something together.  Afterwards, we lost that.  There was no longer that interplay of ideas.”

Pink_Floyd_-_AnimalsIndeed, Waters took control almost completely for “Animals” (1977) and the sprawling “The Wall” (1979), Pink Floyd’s next two LPs.  He insisted on handling virtually all the music and lyrics, and even stage design, props (a gigantic inflatable pig?) and laser-show lighting.  Their lyrics — paticularly for the bloated double album “The Wall” —  continued Waters’ increasingly bleak worldview and his obsession with gloom, mental breakdowns and alienation, which, in turn, alienated the rest of the band.  “Do we have to revisit all this yet again?” questioned Wright, who Waters fired during the album’s recording, yet rehired “as a sideman” for the subsequent tour.

650e11af0608196605b22874167cb01dBoth albums rocketed to #1, and made them the world’s top concert draw at the time.  “The Wall” gave them their improbable #1 hit single, “Another Brick in the Wall (Part II).”  But the internal dissension was growing exponentially — “None of us has ever been the best of friends,” noted Gilmour — and communication was nearly nonexistent, much like the relationship between the band and its audience once Waters executed his desire to build an actual wall on stage, taking the message of isolation to its extreme.

Somehow, the band managed to stay together until, in 1982, Waters presented the group with another concept and a batch of mostly-completed songs.  This time Gilmour balked, saying he thought the material wasn’t up to snuff — and indeed, most of the tracks were rejects from “The Wall” sessions.  Nevertheless, they recorded the underwhelming “The Final Cut,” which turned out to be the final Pink Floyd album in which Waters participated.

It reached #6 and sold two million copies in the US, but you rarely hear many cuts from it, on classic radio or anywhere else.  It was a deflating end to a marvelous reign.

Act III:

Court bMLoRLP01attles over the rights to use the Pink Floyd name (the “brand”) pitted Waters against his former mates in one of the deepest, ugliest splits in rock history, more public even than The Beatles’ infamous breakup.  Waters lost, and Gilmour, Mason and Wright kept the Pink Floyd name in the news with 1987’s “A Momentary Lapse of Reason,” a solid album and tour that maintained the band’s momentum for the rest of the ’80s.

Gilmour’s immediately recognizable guitar and vocals carried the day (much to Waters’ consternation), as they did again in 1994 with the band’s penultimate effort, “The Division Bell,” which also hit the top rs-david-gilmour-0a30d165-1bc6-437c-9306-46ff8352cef2of the charts.  One more Floyd LP, entitled “The Endless River,” was released in 2014, truly a “scraping the bottom of the barrel” collection of discarded snippets from previous sessions, barely worth mentioning.

Gilmour had been occasionally releasing solo albums since as far back as 1978, and his 2006 LP, “On an Island,” reached #6 in the US, a welcome rush of Floydian music for the band’s starved fans.  A tour at that time, and another in support of 2015’s “Rattle That Lock,” met with praise and enthusiastic crowds.

Waters, in the meantime, produced a series of far less successful solo albums — “The Pros and Cons of Hitchhiking” (1982), “Radio K.A.O.S.” (1987) and “Amused to Death” (1992) — and a couple of well-received tours (including a star-studded tour promoting “The Wall”) featured new songs interspersed with the best of tRoger-Waters1-1he Pink Floyd repertoire.  He’s still at it today, participating in the landmark Desert Tour shows on the Coachella grounds in October 2016 (some say he was the highlight), and he’s about to release another LP, “Is This the Life We Really Want?”, later this summer.

As is often the case when bands split up, the various entities did reasonably well, but certainly not as successful as they would have been together.  An uneasy truce was reached for a couple of one-off appearances in 2005-2007, and the band members no longer publicly badmouth eacLive 8 London - Stageh other.  But it’s clear they’ll never record together again, and the band’s catalog will not see any further entries (outside of endless re-packages).

But Pink Floyd’s legacy as one of rock’s true giants remains intact, and one of the music business’s most interesting tales, with a recorded output that rivals damn near any band in history.

 

 

 

 

 

Dear sir or madam, will you read my book?

Everyone has a story to tell.

For those famous enough to get a publishing deal, writing one’s memoirs seems to be more popular than ever.  In the world of popular music, especially rock music of the ’60s, ’70s and ’80s, writing an autobiography, it seems, has become the latest rite of passage.

12523723_1642229336044092_1094993930_nReaders who know me well are aware that, when it comes to books about rock music, I inhale them.   Reference books about the Billboard charts, in-depth examinations of specific genres or regions, biographies (authorized and unauthorized) of famous artists and producers — I love ’em all, soaking up interesting factoids and arcane album information for use in some future party conversation (or this blog).

But why the spike in rock ‘n roll memoirs from survivors of rock’s earlier decades?  Call me cynical, but I’m guessing many of these aging performing artists figure they better commit their tales to paper ASAP before their memories fail them or they keel over (God knows that’s been happening way too often lately).

These memoirs typically include at least one “tell-all” bombshell that will help sell copies, but the best ones offer truly insightful information and thoughtful opinions from some of the major (and minor) players in the rock music kingdom.  And if the reader is really lucky, the book might actually be well written.

Sadly, the bookshelves are littered with recent examples of what amount to “Dear Diary” ramblings — self-indulgent, immature, lamely crafted and in dire need of major editing or a total rewrite.  But the good news is they’re outnumbered by a few dozen really captivating memoirs written in intelligent prose, with a healthy mix of humor, humility, pathos, perspective and (you can’t avoid it in this business) ego.

Let’s face it, if you’re a popular music artist, let alone a rock and roll star, it’s assumed you likely have an outsized ego, an ego big enough to tell you your life is interesting enough, and important enough, that people are going to want to read all about it, from childhood through early struggles to fame and fortune, to maybe scandal, setbacks and rehab.  How literately you tell your story, it should be noted, makes all the difference between respect and ridicule in the end.

No one can say for sure if some of these “autobiographies” were helped along by seasoned journalists serving as ghost writers, but I’m going to give the stars the benefit of the doubt and trust them if they said they wrote them themselves.  All I know is, if it’s an entertaining read, and I learn things I didn’t know before, and I’d recommend it to others, then it was worth my time and money.

Here are 20 recently published memoirs I found to be worthy of your attention.  Full confession:  I didn’t read ALL of EVERY book listed here.  In some cases, I only skimmed them in preparation for this blog, and read a summary of reviews.  But I WILL read them all someday, because it’s my passion.  But meantime:

born-to-run-9781471157790_hr“Born to Run,” Bruce Springsteen, 2016

As a lyricist, Springsteen has written pungent, heartfelt lyrics both concise and wordy, capturing moments or emotions better than almost anyone.  To no one’s surprise, The Boss writes lucidly and with great precision in his memoirs about his long, slow journey from the dead-end Jersey Shore to the peaks of superstardom.  This one’s a no-brainer.

“My Cross to Bear,” Gregg Allman, 2012  gregallman-5-web

I’m not sure I should have expected anything else, but Allman’s book revealed him to be an incredibly selfish asshole for most of his life, and he admits as much.  There’s no denying his brilliance as a blues singer and keyboardist, but holy smokes, he was horrible to every woman in his life, and self-destructive as hell.  Still, he writes about all this in candid, compelling fashion.

51q7zXHMDGL._SX334_BO1,204,203,200_“Boys in the Trees,” Carly Simon, 2016

Largely at arm’s length from the self-destructive lifestyle that damaged many of her contemporaries, Simon survived to tell a decidedly different story from most ’70s singer-songwriters.  She writes from a calm epicenter as a mother/daughter rather than a Grammy-winning artist, and it’s not at all boring but, in fact, invigorating.  

51RBRtjqxEL._SX332_BO1,204,203,200_“Not Dead Yet,” Phil Collins, 2016

What a treat!  The fact that Collins tells his long and winding story with such self-deprecating charm and humor lays waste to his unfair reputation as an egotistical jackass.  He even uses his book’s title to debunk the “Phil is dead” rumor that plagued him in the mid-2000s.   This might be the most entertaining book on this list.

A1MrxsO93VL“Life,” Keith Richards, 2011

Given Keef’s notoriety as rock’s drug poster boy over the years, NO ONE expected this to be even remotely as great as it turned out to be.  How could he remember much of anything, given all he’s ingested?  But recall he did, with considerable flair, and the result is the most praised autobiography of the past decade.

“Joni Mitchell:  In Her Own Words,” as told to Malka Marom, 2014

In a different twist on autobiographical literature, Mitchell teamed 512KWX-ziNLup with long-time confidante/journalist Malka Marom on three occasions (1973, 1979, 2012) to do lengthy, detailed taped interviews, which have been transcribed in Q&A format, giving readers a great deal of insight into Mitchell’s creative songwriting process and her development as a consummate musician.  If you love Joni, or songwriting, this one is a must.

51dL7EZc7UL._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_“Play On:  Now, Then and Fleetwood Mac,” Mick Fleetwood, 2014

The drummer, founder and mainstay of Fleetwood Mac throughout its multi-colored history wrote an earlier memoir in 1991, and much of it is regurgitated here, but with substantial new sections covering the years since then.  If you missed the first round, by all means, check out this one.  There are plenty of great stories about rock music’s most soap-opera-ish band ever.

nash1n“Wild Tales,” Graham Nash, 2013

Always the most level-headed of the raging egos in CSN&Y, Nash writes thoughtfully and with panache, and a candor that’s almost eyebrow-raising at times.  As a guy who broke into the business with The Hollies back in 1963 and still active 54 years later, he has great anecdotes, and sad stories, to share.  Check it out.

51YLsriErbL._SX322_BO1,204,203,200_“Rod:  The Autobiography,” Rod Stewart, 2012

I am no fan of Stewart, but he has played a huge role in rock music over his four-decade ride through rock’s headiest years, from obscure vocalist with the Jeff Beck Group in 1968 to interpreter of the Great American Songbook in the 2010s.  Rod’s memoirs openly admit he was a lucky SOB, but the book also spends an inordinate amount of time on the tabloid-ish blonde-women-he-took-to-bed stuff instead of his musical contributions.  Is it because the former outweighs the latter?

chrissie-hynde-book-cover-2015-billboard-510“Reckless:  My Life as a Pretender,” Chrissie Hynde, 2015

This is one badass woman, surviving as a lady rocker at a time when it was exclusively men’s terrain.  Her memoirs tell a sometimes harrowing story about growing up in hardscrabble Akron, Ohio, fleeing to London during the birth of punk and emerging as a victorious pioneer of New Wave in the early ’80s.  This woman has moxie.

51KO4-JG3bL“Delta Lady,” Rita Coolidge, 2016

My wife met Coolidge at an industry gathering recently and was captivated by her spirit, her guile and her still-impressive artistry.  Many rock fans have no clue how connected she was, professionally and personally, to so many pivotal people in the ’70s and ’80s, and consequently, her memoir makes for revealing reading.

51QF5yqiZvL._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_“Who I Am,” Pete Townshend, 2012

The leader of The Who tends to take himself quite seriously, perhaps too much so, and that makes his autobiography kind of exhausting to absorb.  We’ve always known Townshend is a great writer, having contributed numerous cogent commentaries to Rolling Stone over the years, so the high quality of the narrative here comes as no surprise, as he tells us all we’ll ever need to know about his life in and out of the band.

51VbGyrxGaL“My Life With Earth Wind and Fire,” Maurice White, 2016

White, as EW&F’s founder, guiding light and chief songwriter, had everything to do with the group’s success in the 1974-1983 period, and his autobiography, published in September of last year following his death in February, pays glorious tribute to the whole band and all its contributors.  White was a very spiritual guy who seemed to be without ego, happy to give credit to everyone else.  What a breath of fresh air!

ERIC_CLAPTON_CLAPTON-+THE+AUTOBIOGRAPHY-491024“Clapton:  The Autobiography,” Eric Clapton, 2007

A rock idol and guitarist extraordinaire, Clapton led a life full of difficulties, many of them self-inflicted, and his memoir spells it all out in wrenching detail, simultaneously exposing himself as a man mostly incapable of maintaining anything close to a healthy personal relationship with anyone.  Too bad such a fine singer/songwriter and master interpreter of blues music suffered so much in his personal life…but they say that’s what makes the blues so authentic…

51BTaNj39ZL._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_“Kicking and Screaming:  A Story of Heart, Soul and Rock ‘n Roll,” Ann & Nancy Wilson, 2013

More so than Chrissie Hynde or any other female rocker, Ann Wilson and her sister Nancy had to cope with a ridiculous amount of sexism trying to be rock stars in a world totally dominated by men.  This duet/memoir, which offers the views of both sisters, sheds a lot of light on what it was like to cope with life in rock music, in the 1975-1990 era especially.

51HfPb3lA4L._SX326_BO1,204,203,200_“It’s a Long Story:  My Life,” Willie Nelson, 2015

His first memoirs were published in 1988, and since then his persona has only grown in stature and notoriety.  Consider the title of his 2012 book, “Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die:  Musings From the Road,” which pays perhaps too much attention to his pro-weed stance at the expense of his sizable impact on country (and pop) music over the last 40+ years.  This one is well worth your time, trust me.

51SLOjQsgsL._SX323_BO1,204,203,200_“Sweet Judy Blue Eyes,” by Judy Collins, 2011

Folk chanteuse Judy Collins took us all off guard when she used her memoir, “Sweet Judy Blue Eyes,” to confess a lifelong battle with alcoholism that tormented her personal relationships as well as her recording career.  Her message:  “You don’t have to be a rock and roller to have substance problems.”  Hers is a fascinating story of a journey through the early folk years into the mid-’70s period of hedonistic pursuits that ultimately took their toll on her.

51n-SnV65OL._SX258_BO1,204,203,200_“I Me Mine,” George Harrison, 1979, 2017

The “quiet Beatle” turned out to be among the first rock stars to publish memoirs, back in 1979, and that voluminous tome has been updated by his widow and children in a 2017 edition now in stores.  It’s a bit ponderous as he explores his passion for Eastern philosophies and musical stylings, but still well worth diving into.

2128NPiagEL._SX351_BO1,204,203,200_“Journals,” Kurt Cobain, 2002

This one is an exception to the rule.  It’s pretty clear Cobain never thought, nor did he intend, that his all-over-the-map journal writings would ever see the light of day, but in light of his violent, self-inflected demise in 1994, we can gain valuable insight into his fragile psyche by reviewing the things he had to say in his private moments.  It can be agonizing reading, but also amusing and thought-provoking.

14318._UY400_SS400_“Chronicles, Volume One,” Bob Dylan, 2004 

Always the mystery man, Dylan chose to jump all over the place in this memoir, skipping huge chunks of time as he focused exasperatingly on certain years while ignoring others.  As recently as 2012, he said he is still working on Volume Two, but there’s no way to guess what he’ll concentrate on in that book, if it’s ever published…

A bonus selection:

“Making It:  Music, Sex & Drugs in the Golden Age of Rock,” Ted Myers, 2017

Myers, as it turns out, lives on my block in Santa Monica, and he recently completed his own memoirs about almost making it big as a member of Lost, a regionally popular band in New England in 1964-1967.  Myers played a role, almost Forrest Gump-like, in the lives of numerous rock legends over the years before and since.  His sex tales are a bit on the “too much information” side, if you know what I mean, but the drugs and rock ‘n roll stories are compelling indeed.

Going back a few more years:

“Secrets of a Sparrow,” Diana Ross, 1993

“Cash,” Johnny Cash, 1997

“Long Time Gone:  The Autobiography of David Crosby,” David Crosby, 1988

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Other autobiographies you may want to explore:

“Heaven and Hell:  My Life in the Eagles,” Don Felder, 2007

“Simple Dreams: A Musical Memoir,” Linda Ronstadt, 2013

“Me, the Mob, and the Music,” Tommy James with Martin Fitzptrick, 2010

“Infinite Tuesday:  An Autobiographical Riff,” Mike Nesmith, 2017

“Between a Heart and a Rock Place,” Pat Benatar, 2010

“Dancing With Myself,” Billy Idol, 2014

…Today we have young artists writing their memoirs who haven’t even turned 30 yet.  I mean, Justin Bieber?  Adele?  It’s laughable.  Best wait until you’ve had a life long enough to write about.

…I can’t conclude this essay without bashing a few titles that I found pretty much unreadable. Aerosmith vocalist Steven Tyler appropriately titled his excruciating memoirs “Does the Noise in My Head Bother You?”  (Answer:  Damn right it does, Steve, when it consists of incoherent babblings, brash boasts and non sequiturs.)  David Lee Roth of Van Halen evidently vomited his mindless ramblings into a tape recorder, had it transcribed, and slapped a title on it:  “Crazy From the Heat.”  (You’ve got that right, Dave…)